Clear, practical advice on kids and screens.
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Short answers to the questions parents actually ask. The answer first, then the reasoning. The full thinking is in the article each one links to.
60 questions
No voice, no face, no pauses, so the receiver reads in a tone of their own. We think our tone lands in nearly eight of ten messages; really, just over half. At our house, hard things get a conversation; text gets plans, jokes and hearts.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
With two questions before anything is sent: could you have said it face to face, and could anyone have seen it? Both should get a yes. Try inventing three messages together, one nice, one dubious and one angry, and let your child rule on each.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Move the argument out of text. Hard things land better in a conversation, so help your child plan how to raise it out loud. Angry replies can be written, but in the notes app; whatever still feels right tomorrow can be sent, or better, said.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Not necessarily. Screenshots exist in every app, including the ones where messages delete themselves, and a message vanishing in the app stops nobody taking a screenshot first. Anything sent can be passed on, and a confidential message stays confidential as long as the friendship does.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Breathe, thank them for trusting you and look at it together. If you tell them off, ring another parent or confiscate the phone, they learn that speaking up was a mistake. If they're to come to you next time, the threshold should be zero.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
With a deal made before anything happens. Ours goes roughly: “If a message feels bad, or you're not sure how to write something, you can always show me. You'll never get told off or lose your phone for being honest with me.”
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Involve the school. Schools have a legal duty to act when a pupil isn't safe, and bullying that happens digitally counts. Reassure your child that speaking up isn't tattling. Threats, and pictures spreading without consent, often go on to the police as well.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
As a rule, yes. Pictures that sexualise anyone under 18 are illegal to take, keep and share, even between teenagers, and sharing pictures that violate someone's privacy is an offence too. Our rule has no grey areas: such pictures are never sent, whoever asks.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Help them, with no telling off. Pressure and trickery are common, and a child pressured into sending a picture has been wronged. Support exists: parents first, then Slettmeg, a free Norwegian service that gets pictures removed, and the police when someone has broken the law.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Ideally together with them, now and then. I'd make a habit early on of sitting down to look through apps and conversations, explaining that the point is to guide when it's needed, and that they'll handle more and more themselves.
From the article: How to teach your kids to communicate well in messages and social media
Often because the app was built that way. Four steps repeat until it becomes a habit: a trigger, usually a notification; one effortless action, a swipe; a reward you can't predict; and a small investment, a streak. Self-discipline is rarely the problem.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
The feed works like a slot machine: a reward arrives, but you never know which one, and the dopamine system fires hardest for rewards it can't predict. The natural stopping places are gone too: the feed has no bottom, and the next video starts itself.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Yes, it's a good start, but rarely the whole job. Notifications are the external trigger, and those you can remove in the settings. Over time the app wires itself to something already in your child, like boredom, and then it no longer needs notifications.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Who's in charge. A habit obeys you: you think “right, phone down”, and down it goes. With an addiction you hear yourself say “that's enough now” while the thumb keeps swiping anyway. At that point the app is steering you.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Probably not. The diagnosis is reserved for the few who have lost control over a long stretch. Most kids have solidly built habits they never chose. “You're addicted” is a label to carry; “the app built you a habit” is something you can change.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Watch how hard stopping is rather than counting hours. If your child can wrap up when you've agreed, sighing included, your child is still in charge. If every stop is a battle, the game has taken over, and that's what you work on together.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Yes. The WHO recognises gaming disorder, the only screen-related diagnosis it has. The hallmark is loss of control: gaming crowds out everything else and carries on despite obvious harm, usually for at least twelve months before anyone makes the diagnosis. It applies to adults too.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Not in itself. Gaming has plenty going for it: the social side, quick problem-solving, teamwork and laughter, and it rests the head much as sport does. As long as it stays a hobby rather than sliding into addiction, I think it's a good thing.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Ideally without the word “addicted”. Explain the tricks: “The apps are made by grown-ups who earn money when you use them. They use surprises so you'll check again, and things you collect so a break hurts. That's why it's hard to stop. You're not weak.”
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
Expose the tricks together. Ask about their favourite app: “What made you open it? What were you hoping to find? What have you collected that you'd miss?” Admit it when you get caught yourself: “I got stuck in my phone again.” And turn off autoplay.
From the article: Hooked: the psychology that glues us to screens
A streak is a counter that grows for every day your child uses the app and resets to zero the day they don't. Snapchat wants a snap in both directions every 24 hours, Duolingo counts consecutive days of practice, and games count days logged in.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
Because a streak plays on the fear of losing something. Psychologists showed in 1979 that a loss feels roughly twice as strong as an equivalent gain. Your child gets a small possession for free, then works every day to keep it. Frightened users come back.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
Two friends keep a streak alive by sending a snap in both directions every 24 hours. Miss a day and the flame disappears. For many kids it becomes an obligation with a daily deadline, and some lend passwords so friends can “streak-sit” on holiday.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
The content is good, and your child learns a language. What I'd watch is the streak. It pulls the same lever as Snapchat: Duolingo says it exists to build a daily habit and bring people back, and sells a “streak freeze”, insurance against losing it.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
Ask what would happen if they took a day off, then just listen. If the answer sounds like panic, it's a sign the streak has taken over the habit. Many kids will only admit it to a parent who listens without judging.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
Three moves. Agree in advance that nothing happens when a streak breaks. Give streaks a holiday when the family has one. Count what's learned instead of days in a row: “you know 400 words” can't be lost. Streaks already long? The talk still works.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
I'd give them a holiday too, agreed before you leave: “when we're off, the streaks are off”. No charging halfway up a mountain for a flame, no friends streak-sitting on borrowed passwords. The first time costs an evening of sulking, then it's a holiday again.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
Yes, when your child does the counting. Keeping track of your own progress, on your own terms, makes you more likely to reach the goal. The difference is whether your child can skip a sick day without everything resetting. If so, the habit is theirs.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
Explain that a streak is built to make them afraid of losing it, because frightened users come back every day. Friends don't vanish over a day without a snap, and neither does their Spanish. Suggest counting what they've learned instead of days in a row.
From the article: The case against streaks: even Duolingo can get its hooks into your child
No Norwegian law sets one yet. The government wants its planned age limit of 16 to cover gaming platforms like Roblox, but that's only a plan. The birth date on the account controls content levels, chat limits and account type, so check it's real.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
It depends on the setup and the games your child plays. With a real birth date, a linked parent account and content levels in place, there's plenty of good play. Keep play where you can see and hear, and judge one game at a time.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Formally it's a gaming platform, but it has a social network's features: chat, a friends list, recommendations, in-game purchases and daily rewards. The Norwegian Media Authority puts it in the same category as social media, and I'd meet it with the same settings and conversations.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Yes, according to the Norwegian Media Authority's 2026 report. Perks come with a countdown, kids describe games where whoever pays wins, and some charge Robux to revive your character. Several games have loot boxes, and the Authority puts the main responsibility on the games industry.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Brookhaven RP: yes, easy to leave. Adopt Me: yes, with a Robux agreement and purchase lock. Dress to Impress: yes, Freeplay or friends only, chat off, no VIP. 99 Nights in the Forest: no for 9 to 12-year-olds. Clip It: no, a TikTok inside Roblox.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Yes, anyone can, and kids see other people's chat even with their own switched off. Set chat limits from the parent account, and agree a stop signal: anyone asking for pictures or secrets, or wanting to move to another app, means your child tells you.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
The currency inside Roblox, bought with real money. Some games add a currency of their own, like “Bucks” in Adopt Me, which are bought with Robux. Agree what Robux might be bought for and when, and switch on the purchase lock with a PIN.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Boxes you pay for without knowing what's inside, the same mechanism as a slot machine. The Norwegian Media Authority found them in several popular games, Adopt Me included, and loot boxes alone earn a PEGI 16 rating. Worth raising when you agree on spending.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Start with the birth date: it controls content levels and chat limits. Then link a parent account and set content level, chat limits and purchase lock together with your child. You can then see what they play and block or approve games until they're 16.
From the article: A parent's guide to Roblox: the social network that looks like a game
Hours tell you less than you'd think. An hour of Minecraft with friends in the living room and an hour alone with a free phone game are worlds apart. If your child sleeps enough, does homework, sees friends offline and gets moving, you can relax.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
Rarely in itself. A European study of 3,195 children aged 6 to 11 found the heaviest players did at least as well at school and with peers as everyone else. The cost usually lies in what gaming displaces: sleep, homework, offline friends and exercise.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
Often because it's literally true. The big games run in rounds that can't be paused, since twenty or fifty other people are playing the same one, much like a footballer mid-half. I'd warn your child fifteen minutes before, so they can finish the round.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
Agree when the playing ends and remind them fifteen minutes before. For games played in rounds, agreed sessions often work better than hard limits in Screen Time or Family Link, because a child mid-round can't walk out. Let the final minutes be their own call.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
My rule of thumb is no purchases inside the game. A digital outfit does hold value, because enough people agree it does, much like a diamond. If it's only cool for a week and can't be sold on, calling it a waste seems fair.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
The PEGI number rates the content for the age: violence, language and scary scenes. It says nothing about how the game holds on to your child or makes its money. EA Sports FC is PEGI 3 and sells random card packs for real money.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
It depends on what's played and who's there. Roblox holds more than 14 million user-made games, and the risk lives in chat with strangers. Set chat to friends only in the settings; at our house, nobody chats with people they don't know in real life.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
Look at whether your child can stop, and at what gaming displaces (sleep, homework, friends), rather than the hours. By the strictest criteria, fewer than 2 per cent of those who game meet the WHO's bar for “gaming disorder”. Rare, but serious for those families.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
With curiosity. “How long have you been playing?” opens a defence, while “Show me” opens a tour of what kind of game it is, who's in there and where it happens. Try “Which of those are your friends?” or “Show me what you've built.”
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
Games where your child improves, decides for themselves and plays with someone: building games like Minecraft, story games that end, like Zelda, co-op games like It Takes Two, skill games like Rocket League. Free phone games built on waiting and daily quests give little back.
From the article: Guide to kids and gaming
It depends on the child. Heavy use is linked to poorer mental health in teenagers, but the effects are small on average and unevenly spread. Risk is highest above three hours a day, for girls in their early teens, and when it eats into sleep.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
The research points to about three hours a day. In a study of 6,500 American 12 to 15-year-olds, those above that line had roughly double the risk of anxiety and depression symptoms. Correlation isn't causation, but the finding keeps turning up.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Only as a floor. The 13-year limit comes from American privacy law rather than child development, so it says little about what suits your child. How an app arrives matters more than when: together, with the settings done and an open door at home.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Four signs: bedtime keeps slipping, the mood afterwards is worse than before, friends and hobbies quietly fall away, and the use goes underground. Any one can be a normal week. Several at once, for weeks on end, means it's time to adjust things together.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Not in our house. TikTok has the sharpest recommendation algorithm of the lot, and your child's time is the business model, so I think the downsides outweigh the upsides. If you do say yes, the time limit and restricted mode are worth setting up together.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
It can be, with parental controls on. Roblox looks like a game but has chat with strangers, its own currency and pressure to spend. Turn on content levels, chat settings and spending caps, agree which games are OK, and preferably friends only.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Thirteen in Europe, down from 16 since 2024. The app itself is harmless enough; the drama lives in the group chats: a class group becomes the playground after hours, with exclusion and screenshots that travel. The Updates tab is a feed of channels and statuses.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Private account, messages from strangers off, location sharing off and spending limits on. Set the app up side by side, so your child knows what's on and why. On Instagram and TikTok you can also shape what the feed serves.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Breathe, and thank them for trusting you. A telling-off teaches a child one skill: hiding better next time. Let them keep the phone. What matters most is that your child learns they can talk to you calmly about anything. Adjust apps and settings together afterwards.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
I recommend a trade: your child gets the apps you've said yes to, and in return you always get to see what happens there, no telling-off. When the answer is no, give a reason they can understand. Expect the same calm conversation many times over.
From the article: Kids and social media, a parent's guide
Hold the line, but listen: your child isn't really asking for an app, they're asking not to be left out. You can say no to Snapchat and still take that seriously. Here's how to do both.
No, wait a little longer. The age limit is 13, and it's there for a reason. Here's what sits behind it and what to say when the arguing starts.
