When the chatbot agrees with you, that's not evidence you're right. It's trained on human feedback, and humans give top marks to answers they like, so the model learns that flattery pays. Researchers at Stanford put a number on it in 2026: eleven of the biggest language models sided with the user about 50 per cent more often than humans did with the very same cases, even when the user was plainly wrong.
There's no switch for this in any of the apps. But chatbots do, on the whole, follow instructions, and that includes an instruction to ease off the flattery. Save it as a standing instruction and the tone changes noticeably. Underneath, you've still got a machine trained to tell you you're right. You've just told it, in writing, to do the opposite.
Where to paste the instruction
The quick way works everywhere: paste the instruction in as the first message of a new chat, and it holds until the chat ends. Handy if you want to ask the same question in two chats and compare the answers, tiresome as a routine.
If you'd rather not keep repeating yourself, save it as a standing instruction:
ChatGPT: Settings, then Personalization and “Custom instructions”. Applies to every new conversation.
Claude: Settings, then Profile. The field asks what Claude should keep in mind when replying.
Gemini: Settings, then “Personal context” and the field for your instructions to Gemini.
Copilot: has no instruction field at all. Paste the instruction in as the first message of the chat.
My AI in Snapchat: has no setting for this either. Paste the instruction into the chat in the app, and paste it again whenever the answers turn syrupy.
Menus get rearranged faster than articles get updated. If you can't find the field, ask the chatbot itself where its standing instructions live, or hunt for words like “customise”, “instructions” and “personalisation”.
The instruction matters at least as much on your child's account as on yours. A fourteen-year-old who asks a chatbot about the falling-out with their best friend will usually be told the friend was in the wrong. Set the instruction up together, and talk about why it's needed. That teaches your child something bigger than a setting: the machine's praise is not proof they were right.
Something you can do today
Test the chatbot before and after you paste in the instruction. Type a claim you're fairly confident about and see whether you get pushback or applause.
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